When. Were the Pyramids Built

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Not every pyramid is a Giza-level overachiever. The first one, the Step Pyramid of Djoser, was built around 2630 BCE. That’s like the prototype—a little clunky, a bit staircase-y, but it got the job done. It was the Egyptian version of that first ugly website you made in 1998, before you figured out CSS.

Then later pyramids, like those from the Middle Kingdom, were built around 2000 to 1700 BCE. By that point, the Egyptians had perfected the formula. Unfortunately, they also forgot to waterproof the inside passages, so many of them crumbled into sad piles of rubble. It’s like buying a high-end car and never changing the oil.

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And the very last pyramid built for a pharaoh? That was around 1550 BCE. After that, the Egyptians basically said, “You know what? Let’s just bury the kings in secret holes in the Valley of the Kings. Less stress, no tourists stealing the cornerstones for their garden paths.”

The Real Punchline: It’s All Sort of Recent

Here’s the thing that always makes me smile. The pyramids were ancient to the ancient Greeks. When Herodotus visited in 450 BCE, he wrote about them like we’d write about Stonehenge today. “Whoa, look at these old things!” He had no more idea how they were built than we do about assembling IKEA furniture without leftover screws.

So, when were the pyramids built? About 4,500 years ago, give or take a few centuries for the smaller ones. They’re old, dusty, and full of unanswered questions—kind of like your attic, but with better lighting and fewer mothballs. And honestly, the fact that they’re still standing while your phone battery dies after three hours? That’s the real miracle.

Next time you’re stuck in traffic or waiting for toast to pop, just remember: those stones have been waiting for napkins for four millennia. They don’t mind the wait. Neither should you.